Monday, October 31, 2011

Overcoming My Fear of Praying Out Loud

By Michelle Lewis
A Moms In Touch Co-Leader

     Fear has ruled my life for many years, becoming a stronghold that limited my ability to do God’s work. Fear of failing, fear that I’m not good enough, fear of the unknown—I’m prone to be fearful over pretty much any new situation that is presented to me.
     Well, a few years ago, the Lord got a hold of me and began working on this fear of mine. When my boys were 4 and 1, praying was something I only did by myself, if at all. I wasn’t in a habit of praying and I NEVER prayed out loud, not even with my husband. I mean this was absolutely terrifying to me. But God got a hold of my heart and began really working on this “fear” that I wasn’t letting go of.
     When Nate entered preschool, a woman I did not know stopped me in the hallway and began talking to me about starting a Moms In Touch group for our preschool. I didn’t really know what MITI was, but I agreed to attend the introductory meeting she was planning. I was curious. I knew it involved praying and wanted to know more. I attended the meeting and was feeling convicted right there.
     The idea of praying out loud was frightening, but the Lord had already begun softening my heart to the idea, and the conviction was just too powerful to pass up. I decided to go to the first MITI meeting and figured I’d just listen to the other moms pray. What I didn’t know, but the Lord did, was there would be only one other mom – the leader. Just her and me – that was it!! She prayed and then I prayed. It was wonderful!
     As the weeks went on, my fear was lessening, and I was joyfully praying for my son and praying for the other mom’s kids as well. My experiences praying in a MITI group and what I discovered about God were almost addicting. I saw how He gave me peace as I prayed for His help. I felt His presence with us during those meetings when I would see how the Lord heard and answered many of our prayers. My faith in God’s ability to help me despite my fears was very evident during this season in my life, and I began to trust Him more and more.
     In the fall of 2009, I really felt led to start a church-based Moms In Touch group for the women at my church. But, of course, there was a problem: This would mean I would have to co-lead the group. This was still a scary idea for me, but the Lord has continued to show me that when I seek Him first, ask for His guidance and then trust in His leading, all I have to do is obey and take that first step.
     God has shown me that we need to be our kids’ prayer warriors. Whether our children are babies, young kids, teenagers or adults, they need our prayers.
     While I still am fearful of new situations, when I obey and follow through in what the Lord is asking of me, I’m always blessed by the way He works in my life. He continues to show me that as long as I do my part, He will do His. I trust that with all my heart.

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